Do It Anyway

Over the weekend I had an experience, one I've had many times as I'm sure you have too in one way or another. My daughter and her friend ordered food from a restaurant and when I found out I asked her if she would pick up an order for me as well. When she went to pick up the order they only had hers ready and not mine even though we both received a confirmation that both orders were ready. My daughter showed them the confirmation text, however, the lady at the desk simply kept saying that they didn't have the order and my daughter didn't have time to stay to figure it out. Instead she called me so I got in the car and headed in that direction. I, of course, was a little annoyed that they sent a text that the order was ready when it wasn't, but was also annoyed that I had to go all the way in to figure it out. Even then, I tried to remain calm remembering that it was probably busy since it was the weekend, and also understanding that sometimes mistakes happen. However, my annoyance grew as I met the lady at the counter and she gave me the same nonchalant look that she gave my daughter and message of, "We don't have it", so my attitude went to a defensive, "Okay, but what are you going to do about it? I understand if you're too busy to make it, but then I need a refund!" Then, her attitude quickly went from not caring to being just as annoyed as I was as she began the process of refunding a customer. She became even more annoyed when I asked for her name in case the request for a refund didn't go through. I took her name, said thank you, and left while trying to process all that had happened. This whole situation really wasn't a huge deal, but I think I sometimes have a hard time with keeping my value of being polite, while also keeping my value of being assertive when I need to be. Looking back on it, I think I did okay under the circumstances, but situations like this always bother me. In the end I've found that I'm more at peace with myself if I stand my ground in a calm and logical way, but let things go if the fight's not worth it. Furthermore, I've found taking the high road not only brings peace, but surprisingly, empowerment. I think it's the difference between giving in just to avoid any type of conflict, and giving in because it's a choice. 

I love the advice found on the wall of Mother Teresa's home for children in Calcutta that's titled Do It Anyway, so I bought a wooden panel with the words printed on it and hung it on my wall as a reminder that when all else falls, it's always best to go with peace and harmony, which, depending on the situation, may mean keeping your peace by simply walking away. The saying goes like this:

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered

forgive them (or let it go and go your own way) anyway

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives

be kind anyway

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies

succeed anyway

If you are honest and sincere, people may try to deceive you

be honest and sincere anyway

What you spend years creating, others could destroy over night

create anyway

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous

be happy anyway

The good you do today, will often be forgotten

do good anyway

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough

do your best anyway

In the end, it is between you and God

it was never between you and them anyway

I think these days, with all that is going on in the world and in our nation, I would add to this... people will try to induce fear to upset you... be calm and at peace anyway. Because everything will go better if we go through life calm and peaceful, rational and aware, kind and loving, honest and sincere, and genuinely wanting the best for everyone. So hopefully the next time we're faced with a person or situation where it's easy to let kindness or simple humanity go out the window we'll, instead, Do It Anyway...